hey saucy, doin well !! its still an i not a y !!

I don't care.

this is the longest thread ever.

hell damn fart

I've noticed !!

MN state fair FTW!!!

You noticing doesn't change me caring. Keep trying though.


Bryce <3

lipshits

LOL!
This thread is nearly 3 years old.
Who will be the one to finally close it?

Bar, do you honestly think there is such a thing as a "non-alcholic cocktail"? cuz, I think taht pretty much defeats the purpose right there.

Mocktail?

To some old school bartenders the only cocktails are | gin martini (some allow vodka, and no, a cosmo is not a martini. And just because they put 'tini' in the name doesn't make it a martini!), Old Fasioned, Manhatten, Rob Roy, Gimlet, Gibson.

Everything else is a "mixed drink". Now, technically, the definition of the two are the same, however I was trained that these 6 drinks are the "classic cocktails" that invented the genre, so only they recieve the name of "cocktail".

Now, back to the rant about "Martini's". People think just because a drink comes in a cocktail glass (what many wrongly call a martini glass) that it makes it a "martini". Well, until James Bond came along a martini was strictly gin and vermouth. A Rob Roy is Scotch and vermouth. A Manhatten is Bourbon and vermouth. So how the hell can Vodka and vermouth be a martini? It should have it's own name. But, when they made the first James Bond movie, Smirnoff Vodka stepped in and said, "Hey, we'll give you a butt load of money if you do this product placement for us". Thus, the vodka "martini" was born.
I mean, hell, the drinks were so specific that if you put cocktail onions into a martini, it was no longer called a martini. It becomes a Gibson! And in a Gimlet you replace the vermouth with lime juice!
So, then the cosmopolitan comes along. It is referred to as a "cocktail" because it kind of goes back to the classic basic cocktail. It is simply Vodka, Triple Sec, lime and cranberry. It is almost a modern Old Fasioned (bourbon, vermouth, cherry, orange, bitters). The cosmo is a hit, but because it is served in a coctail glass and is made with vodka people think of it as a martini. The next thing you know people are taking shots, putting them in cocktail glasses, bumping up the price $3 and calling them "Martini's". For example, the simple Lemon Drop. A basic vodka shot loved by college kids everywhere. Well, put it in a cocktail glass, bump up the price, and call it "Lemon Drop Martini". It's the same damn drink and it's not a Martini!!!
GRRRRRRRR!!!!
And a three wise men is not Jager/Rumple/Goldschlager, it's Jim Beam/Jack Daniels/ and Johnny Walker Black Label (or Jim, Jack and Johnny Black). That new fangled 3 wise men was called a Nazi until the late '90's early '00's. And the 4 Horsemen are not the Nazi with 151 on top. That's just nasty anyway. A 4 Horsemen is a 3 Wisemen with Jose Cuervo on top (still gross, lol).
So, when you come to my bar and order something improperly it angers me. Especially when you order a 3 wisemen and then tell me I made it wrong. Well, buddy, stop doing all your drinking in college bars and go out and see the world!
And don't look at me like I'm an idiot when you order a shot you get at your local bar all the time and I've never heard of it. Bartenders make up their own shots all the time and run them as specials. So no, I've never heard of a "Jizz on Nun". The name doesn't even make sense! And if you don't know what's in it, and you are the one ordering it, I'm not the idiot for never having heard of it. You are the idiot for drinking something that you don't know what it is!
Everyone go out and ask for a Red Butt Monkey Love. It's my own creation. It's in the Royal Fuck family. There are only a handfull of bartenders that know how to make it. How about a bomb pop. I used to have my fellow bartenders call me on my nights off because the demand for Bomb Pops was so high. But, I never divulged that recipe to anyone (and it has like 10 things in it so nobody could figure it out from watching me). That shot kept people coming in on my shifts. It also got many losers laid.
That's why I was voted Most Popular Bartender several years running.

Huh, kinda got off track...

You have impressed me Chris. Whenever I ask for a gimlet, i have to explain what it is. And your absolutly right. All those fancy shots that we enjoyed in the 80's are now drinks listed on a Fridays menu.
DJ'ing in bars and clubs for 12 years has had it's benefit of trying lots of new drink/shot recipies my friends the barkeeps made up.

I wanna try that Red Butt Monkey Love. Can you PM me?

Also, How do i set up a Yukon Slammer? I hav'nt had one of those in about 22 years.

sooooooo...yes or no?

here's a grammer lesson...when you have an "e" on the end of a word or name in this case...it makes the letter 2 places behind it say the name of the letter...you spell it with a "y"...now try to say that........exactly it doesnt sound right...now replace that "y" with an "i" and say it again........now that sounds better huh ?? is that more clear for you Bradley ??

A "grammer" lesson? How can you be giving a grammar lesson if you cant spell grammar =) Then again Idk what in the world this 'introduction' post has become.

Should you be correcting other people's grammar when you can't spell can't? LOL
Anyways Bargod, I'm keeping it simple, can I have a margarita please? (On the house!)

The Red Butt Monkey Love is a Royal Fuck with banana liqueur instead of peach schnapps...
So:
1 oz. Crown Royal
1/2 oz. Banana
1/2 oz. cranberry juice

It's actually much better when made with 99 bananas (99 proof banana liqueur)

Also in this family is the Red Headed Slut, which is a Royal Fuck with Jaegermeister instead of Crown.
I was introduced to a Crown shot several years back called a 3 legged monkey. It's crown with a splash of Coke and a slash of Sprite. How it got that name I have no idea.
Personally I prefer to just shoot Crown.

well you know theres this thing called "typo" i believe thats what happened...so get off my nuts !!

Was only kidding And T6 lol so what I missed a litte " ' " lol.

Man, I'm stuck in Rockland, Maine drinking beer with a bunch of fisherman. I never realized the rocks in Penobscot Bay are charted but not the reefs.

Good to know I guess.

I'll be back Friday. back to my COD crack. I'm jonesin already.

Why so sad little smurf?...

LOLOLOLOLOL

You guys still have this thing going???? I just happened to hop in tonight and saw that it is still working it's way up the charts..

Somebody really needs to get a hold of Guinness because it has had to have broken or started a record..

You guys/girls are awesome-

Hi Flash!

Hi Bargod!!!!!

Things that make ya go.....hmmmm

HI EVERYONE!

i wonder if anyone is reading this

no

Where the hell is everyone hiding?

Post, post post !!!!!



Here's a post:



Hey Geno and Slim, we just joined your 6v6 ladder!

Good times. Good times.

ROFL

Check out the Something Awful forums, they have threads there with over 10,000 replies. This one doesn't even have 4000.

:=)

um....passin *shrug*

If I can't have you, I don't want nobody baby.

If I can't have you Ahhhhhh



Sing it!!!!

My balls itch.

lol they DO make medicine for that, ya know.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wfGD5FgtNtY

I just scratch mine on Slim's chin.

i demand McGriddle points!!!

Who drank all my beer and vodka, and why do I feel like shit today?

I did


Too much *Passin*.....???

Funny, I was at a party where there was only beer and vodka. Was this cheap $10/handle plastic bottle vodka? Cause that's what was there...luckily I had my Bacardi Gold to save me.

Wow 100 pages of nothingness. Think it will make it another 100?

100?
Very doubtful it will see another 25 pages.

About 3 months ago, I had a really slow day at work.
Out of boredom, I went thru the thread, start to finish.
90% I probably never read before, lots of junk but mixed in were some really good post.

Maybe the next time I get stuck at work with nothing to do, I'll consolidate the 250+ pages into a "Best of" thread.



The real question now is who will get the 4000th post

does some good ol spam count for the 4000th post?

oh well, i think i had the 3000th ill let this one go...maby we can hit 5k

i actually had post #2000 actually...oh well, 2 more for what has to be some kind of record

or 3 moar, this damn new system puts all my spam in one post : (

Haha, I'm sure you'll get it buddy. Perhaps with my help you'll get it or somebody else will ninja in and grab it creating World War 3 on the internetz.

Not Me.

I believe in you Blitz, you can do it!

Next person, go go go go!